This is the story of my most memorable date. When I tell it in person, I spin it to make myself look good, and/or I adjust it for the audience -- but, I'll try to recount the complete version here.
A good friend of mine had a contract job where he met a guy named Rudy. Rudy is a lawyer from New York who moved to Denver in order to break into legislation. That move doesn't make a ton of sense. That's like thinking: "I'd like to get good at riding horses, so I think I'll eat more M&Ms" -- random. (Ooh -- Bob Dole is on Steven Colbert . . . I'll be back . . . I lean leftish, but Bob Dole is a funny man. Okay -- it's over.) Okay, so Rudy . . . Where Rudy's professional instincts were a little haywire, his instincts for finding shallow sex were top flight. Which is all the more impressive because he had a vibe that could creep girls out. Maybe those traits go together -- I don't know. I liked Rudy, don't get me wrong, and I was intrigued by his method.
See, Rudy would go on myspace and find a girl he thought was cute. He'd read the page and learn some fact about her. Then he would write a message and challenge her. (i.e. if she liked old Nintendo games, he would tell her that he was better than any girl at any Nintendo game.) The girl would usually write back, they'd go out, and he'd try to get her in bed. The closer he got to sleeping with a girl, the higher he would place her among his friends on his myspace page. So the girls he was sleeping with would be at the top and the girls he was just meeting for the first time were at the bottom. When girls hear about this method, they tend to think Rudy is scuzzy. I don't know why that should be inherently true -- but that's a different story. Ultimate shallow sex notwithstanding, no matter how the guy interacts with a girl once they have started dating, the WAY that Rudy MEETS women doesn't have any ethical problems as far as I can tell. So, I decided to try it.
I found a hot red-headed girl who said she was smart. As a rule, I tend to like people who think they are smart. It makes life easier. You don't have to dumb anything down. If you disagree with them, you don't have to worry that they will take it personally -- a person who is secure in his or her own wattage is generally willing to hear other points of view. There is a weird taboo in our society about acknowledging ones own intelligence. You can be proud of physical strength. You can be proud of physical appearance. You can be proud of professional success. But, if you SAY that you are smart, people will take that as an insult. Somehow the popular translation of "I am smart" is "you are dumb." People are sensitive about "smart." But, if you say that you are smart to a person who thinks that he or she is smart -- that person doesn't care what you think of your own intelligence. So, I wrote to this girl and I said "Oh yeah? How smart?" And, dig it -- Rudy was right -- she wrote back.
To be continued.
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